Third Draft of Script

After receiving a comment about my script from a target audience member and thinking over my own criticisms of my script, I decided I would re-draft the last scene, mostly because I think it had the following errors:

  • The build up to the argument is very short, making the arguement quite sudden. Not only does this make the argument implausible, it also makes it quite confusing for the audience.
  • The character Louise is intentionally vindictive towards Ellen. This was never the idea for her character
  • Having to film Louise walking out the front of the cafe and entering would waste precious seconds of film.

These problems have all been rectified in the newest draft of the script. As far as I can see, and providing that there is no more negative audience feedback as a result of tomorrow’s polls results, this should be the last draft of the script:

Third Draft The Season to be Jolly Script


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